We live in a society where we are always on the go. We are balancing more than we ever have before. So much so, that at some point, a lot of us stop paying attention to our own well-being.

Fitness goes out the window. Tension builds in our body. Our emotional health goes downhill. And we’re still trucking through life regardless. Unaware of how it’s impacting us or those around us.

But in order to be fully healthy – in spirit, soul and body – we have to be self-aware of how we’re really doing and the ways in which we can take better care for ourselves.

Each person is different and has their own catered self-care practices for their needs, but I, Christa, have teamed up with Eboni W. of The Fitt Team to lay out 5 ways that you can set yourself up for success in progressing on your journey of self-care.

1. The Quiet Place – A Life-Changing Morning Routine

Christa – The way you start your day is indicative of how the rest of your day will go. So many of us start our day on the cell phone catching up on the latest trending news topic or hashtag. And although social media isn’t a bad thing by itself, it can wait.

Instead, begin your morning with a clear head. Sit in the silence. Read a book. Journal. Play a record. Light a candle. Say your affirmations. Revisit your vision board. Practice some yoga. Do whatever you have to do to get in the right mental space and love yourself well. 

Know that this may require you to get up earlier than you usually do, actually get up on the first alarm, or even keep your phone out of your direct line of sight until your morning routine is complete. It’s worth the extra time and effort. Trust me, this one is a game-changer.

Eboni – As a mom and entrepreneur, the first few moments of the day are crucial; however sacrificing any additional sleep, means I’m pretty much living off of 3-hour naps. So one tangible way I ensure I have time to journal for my morning routine is by preparing at night. I take the last moments of my night ensuring my daughter has clothes picked out, breakfast is planned in advance, alarms are set and “Do Not Disturb” on my phone is activated until my morning commute. In short, I have found that one of the best ways to prepare for your morning is by developing a night routine!

2. Get to Organizing: A Few Important Minutes a Day

Christa – Listen, life gets messy. Both literally and figuratively. It’s best to proactively tend to the details to help prevent the controllable “mess” that may come with your day. One great way to do this is, after you’ve had your morning relaxation time, take a few minutes to glance at your calendar. See what you have on deck for the day. Prepare for it. Then look at your schedule for the whole week and move things around that aren’t aligning with your top priorities. Build in time to dream up ideas, call family, go to the gym, rest, and whatever else you tend to put on the back-burner when life gets hectic. 

And this goes for household chores and errands too. An unorganized house reflects an unorganized mind. Coming home to a place that’s in order usually frees your mind to get itself in order too. It’s almost as if making room in your physical space also makes room for more mental space. And I know we can all use as much mental space as we can get.

Eboni – I completely agree, Christa! Being organized allows you the freedom to be more creative in your business! A tangible piece of advice that was passed down to me during my early parenting years is that your house doesn’t have to be “spic and span” daily. Meaning you don’t have to feel the pressure of living in the perfect Pinterest house. Just take a few moments each day to pick up and replace out-of-place items, then choose one day per week to deep clean for a few hours. This cleaning and organizing schedule allows time with my daughter, time with myself, all while keeping the house clean without driving myself or my daughter up a wall!

3. Solo Dates: One Day a Week Just For You

Christa – I don’t know about you, but I tend to live my life for others a lot of the time. Between work and relationships, life often becomes about others rather than me and my needs. That’s not necessarily always a bad thing because the relationships in my life are extremely important to me, BUT we can’t pour ourselves out to others from an empty cup. We must also pour back into ourselves. One way that we can do that is by dedicating at least one day out of the seven-day week to just us. Go on a date with yourself and do the things that you consider to be life-giving. Maybe that’s reading, going on a hike, watching a movie or getting some ice cream. If you’re familiar with the idea of Sabbath, then this can be that for you. It’s time set out to get re-connected and put the distractions aside. It can look a lot of ways for a lot of people, but give yourself permission to take that personal time. You deserve it.

Eboni – Christa, I couldn’t have said it better! Solo dates as a mom and entrepreneur are essential to your mental well being, finding the time to take them and be fully engaged is like finding a diamond while simply walking down the street! My mind is always GO-GO-GO. One way that I find time for myself among the chaos of serving others is to SCHEDULE it! It doesn’t need to be a full 24 hours, but I’ll schedule “mommy and me” time and a seperate time to pour into myself and not serve anyone else. My go-to is lighting some incense or candles, turning on some Erykah Badu and simply relaxing! I recently took myself out to a restaurant, dressed up as if I was going on a date, ordered exactly what I wanted and spent time with myselfAt first it was a little awkward, but afterward, I felt so renewed, refreshed, and exhilarated!

4. Community Check-Ins: A Monthly Kind-Of Thing

Christa – Okay, so life gets busy. We know this. And by this point, we are starting to get that self-care is a good way to make sure that you don’t get lost in the busyness. But let me tell you that self-care doesn’t mean that you have to care for yourself all alone. We should have people in our lives that deeply care about us. CHECK-IN WITH THEM REGULARLY (monthly at the very least). It will do your soul good. Whether it’s a coffee date with a friend, a workout with a partner, a phone call with your parents, or even a session with your therapist: Check-in. Tell them how you’re doing. Get it off your chest. And hear them out on what they have to say as well. I think you’ll find that often we get so caught up in our own world that we forget that there are people who know us well and may have some different perspectives and ideas on our situation paired with helpful advice on how to deal with it that just might be the jump-starter we need. 

Community is pretty dope in that way. Lean on them.

Eboni – You’re right! To take it even one step further, be sure to surround yourself with friends with similar goals (networking events are great ways to find new like minded friends) and check in with them INTENTIONALLY. Don’t just check in to say “hey” and see how they are doing, ask probing questions, ask them about their goals, and, if permitted, offer solutions to their problems. I often check in with my friends WITHOUT the intention of unloading on them, but more so to simply GIVE my ear to allow them a safe space to unload. Remember, sometimes friends simply need to be heard in order to feel your support, be sure your check-ins are “give and take” and not just simply passing on bad energy.

5. Mini-Retreats: A Quarterly Treat

Christa – Okay, so here’s my final tip. And I will admit that this one is a bit of a luxury. Treat yourself to a quarterly retreat (semi-annual or annual works too). Every so often, get away from your everyday surroundings and take some space to breathe and see the world differently. Do some inner work. Realign on your wellness goals – physical, emotional and spiritual. Allow yourself to re-energize so you have the vigor to fully go after your goals again. You’ll glow different. You’ll become more in tune with yourself. And you’ll leave that time feeling ready to keep kicking life in the butt.

Eboni – There are also ways to maximize your relaxation and minimize the dollar spent! I personally have booked a mini “stay-cation” by maximizing the last-minute deal booking sites! I’ve also tried booking a trip with a travel group! This way you cut down on cost, but are surrounded by new people and can experience new countries all while saving coins. Luxuries don’t always have to come at luxurious prices! 

There you have it. These are 5 ways that you can structure your life around radical self-aware and self-love. Each of these things takes intentionality, commitment, and work. But we all know that we have to work for what we want. And I don’t know about you, but what I want is to be thriving in every single area of my life. So let’s make sure to put in the work to make our well-being a priority and live a life that fully supports that.

The Curvy Christian is Signing Off. thecurvychristian.org | Instagram: @thecurvychrista

Guest Feature: Eboni W. |thefittteam.com| Instagram: @fitt.eboni